Last month we gave you the top 10 worst sequels. Well this month, we’re continuing the countdown. So, without further adieu, here are the next 10 worst sequels ever made.
10. The Hangover: Part II
So you want to follow up a classic comedy? Well first of all, DON’T. Oh, you didn’t want to listen to me? Okay fine. Then maybe at the very least, you shouldn’t straight up copy the first film right? Oh, never mind. Well, it’s still going to be funny right? Oh, it’s not all the funny either. It’s simply a pale imitation of the first one. Actually, The Hangover: Part II is shockingly dark for a comedy. But don’t worry, the franchise can get darker. Just wait until the third film. Even the incredible cast couldn’t save these sequels.
9. Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare
The idea of Freddy Kruger getting bored with murdering children and therefore finding wackier and wackier ways to kill them in order to amuse himself is a really great idea. As is the idea of him having a secret daughter. That actually adds a twisted and personal element to him being a child torturer and murderer. But sadly, neither of those ideas we executed well in what is obviously the weakest entry in the series. Robert Englund tries his hardest, but flounders due to a wonky script. Even wonderful cameos from Alice Cooper and Johnny Depp couldn’t save this one. It’s a good thing Wes Craven came back to the franchise for the next film.
8. Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers
This is a weird one. The film went through production hell and even has a completely alternate cut of the film called Halloween 666: The Origin of Michael Myers. It is the better version, but it’s still not great. But the theatrical version is by far the worst entry in the once great Halloween franchise. The directing is awful, and the editing is even worse. A good chunk of the film is nonsensical and it was edited to hell. You can’t even tell what is going on or who is being killed. The “twist” at the end is sloppily handled and doesn't make any sense. And why is Michael oozing green blood? I have no idea.
7. Silent Hill: Revelation
I will stand by my opinion that the first Silent Hill film is among the best video game adaptations made. It perfectly captured the feel of the games and the haunting and disturbing atmosphere. But it ended on a terrific cliffhanger which this sequel struggled to answer. It’s not completely the filmmaker’s fault. This is another one that went through years of production hell. But sadly the result was very underwhelming. It’s choppy, fairly nonsensical, and has some pretty rough CGI to boot. Even Carrie-Anne Moss and cameos from Sean Bean and Radha Mitchell couldn’t save it. It’s a shame the story didn’t get the proper ending it deserved.
6. Batman & Robin
Ya’ll knew this was coming. It’s infamous. What more can be said about the most cartoony and cornball-y of the Batman films (and yes that does include the Adam West films). At least the West films knew what they were and leaned into it. Here, Schumacher can’t strike a good tone to save his life. Clooney is wooden as Bruce, Chris O’Donnell falls flat as Dick Grayson, and whoever cast Alicia Silverstone needs to be slapped. Hard. Uma Thurman actually gives a fine performance as Poison Ivy, and Arnold Schwarzenegger reveals his turn as Freeze. Even if he is a terrible match to the character, at least he had some fun. And he in turn helps me have what little fun I can in this film. “What killed the dinosaurs? The ICE AGE!”
5. Christmas Vacation 2: Cousin Eddie’s Island Adventure
Christmas Vacation is bonafide classic! And look, I love Randy Quaid as Cousin Eddie as much as the next guy. But Eddie is best used as a background character. His insane nature plays against Chevy Chase’ Clark Griswold perfectly. Giving him his own movie is entirely too much. It starts at a 10 and has nowhere to rise to. The jokes are lazy, and badly staged. Randy has incredible comedic timing, and he is solely responsible for the few laughs this movies delves out. But even he can’t save this from being a turd.
4. Transformers: The Last Knight
Okay, look, the Transformers films have never been the high point of cinema. But damn, this fifth one is bad. It’s literally so bad, it’s almost like it is personally trying to make you hate it at every turn. This film does not care what you think. It is there to be as loud and ridiculous as possible. At this point not even the action is worth it. The promise of Unicorn couldn’t even save this. Mark Wahlberg does… things. I guess he’s a descendant of King Arthur? And his horrifically forced love interest is apparently a descendant of Merlin. Oh, and did I mention the film’s opening shot is Merlin (played by Stanley Tucci) drunkenly riding a horse and looking into camera to say “I’m shnozzled”? Yeah, that happens. So does Anthony Hopkins laughing maniacally as he and his insane robot butler run people off the roads. You think the second film is bad? This fifth film doesn’t care at all. Not a SINGLE fuck was given. And in some odd way, I kind of respect it a little for that. But only a tiny, tiny amount.
3. Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2
Did we NEED a sequel to the first film? It wasn’t high art, but it was harmless and enjoyable enough. But this film takes it to the next level. A level it should have never been taken to. We do not need baby superheroes. And we certainly don’t need THESE baby superheroes. It literally hurts my brain watching this film. Skip it.
2. Caddyshack 2
Oof. This one really. Really hurts. A terrible follow-up to one of the greatest comedies of all time. The couldn’t get half of the cast back, in fact, one of the only returning actors is Chevy Chase. Although, I don’t know why. Did he actually need the money? Dan Aykroyd replaces Bill Murray, and while he is fun (and one of the few highlights of the film) he still isn’t Bill. Anyway, this sequel takes what was a wonderful sen-up of waspy, overly snobby and rich country clubs, and turns it into a cartoon. Literally, the film involves tearing down the golf course in favor of an outrageous mini-golf course. I miss Bill Murray and Rodney Dangerfield.
1. Speed 2: Cruise Control
Yes, that is the title fo the film. Please take this seriously. So, you’re going to make a sequel to one of the greatest action hits of the 90’s? SWEET! Oh, Keanu is gone? BOO. But Willem Dafoe is your villain? NICE. Oh, but Sandra Bullock is your hero. WHAT THE FUCK? Why was her character from the first film even considered? It makes no sense. And trying to copy the concept from the first film, but with a boat, also falls completely flat. Nothing here really works. Willem is the one shining light in this dark film. And even he has a hard time at it.
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